Parenting Dark Side Style.

I'm not sure how I came across this site, but it's pretty dang funny.  I know I pissed  a lot of people off with the Dancing Nathaniel Videos, but I hope I haven't ruined all video related posting privileges.  While we're all still adjusting to D's arrival, I'll keep it light.

Since this is prominently a parenting blog, I wanted to share this parenting video. 

Have a great weekend my friends.


Open Letter To My Readers

Dear Juggilng Eric Readers,

Last Friday is what I call the Lurker Letdown of 2011.  I challenged  my lurkers (those of you who do not comment regularly) to actually comment and if I did not receive 30 comments, I would play dancing Nathaniel for 30 days.

While I was ready to go the whole 30 days of just posting Nathaniel just to stick it to the lurkers, I've decided not to be a d-bag about it.  So with that I'm ending my protest.

Mainly because my vocal readers have asked me to let it go.

I  do appreciate my vocal and mute readers and I was not aware that dancing Nathaniel would cause so much strife and anxiety.

While Nathaniel has been entertaining you, D has been getting quite accustomed to our home.  She actually slept through the night last night for the first time.  Prior to today we've been run ragged.  We didn't really expect any less with a new baby in the house.

So expect these to be light for a while and my comments on your blogs to be few.

Have a great day my friends.

p.s. send cookies.


porkchops and applesauce.


nate the great.


i had a dream.


apple bottom jeans.


consequences and repercussions.


Intergalactic Delurking Day.

All across the galaxy today bloggers should be celebrating Delurking Day.  (Don't trust me, check out Tales From The Dad Side and Luke I Am Your Father, they're doing it too) Lurking is what Lurkers do.  Lurkers are those people who read blogs but don't leave comments.  Sure the post could be something totally heart felt that the blogger feels his readers will enjoy and hopefully be touched on a deeper level.

Obviously I suck at touching people at deeper levels.  So I need to get West Side on you guys.

Last year, I threatened to shoot this kitty.  If I didn't get comments.

You guys called my bluff and sent me into a crying fit for days based on the seven comments I got.  One was even SciFi Dad twisting the knife commenting on the poor turnout.  

Well this year I'm not kidding.  I want comments.  I'll even count profane comments  (I'll just edit them). But I want it all this year.  I want at least thirty.  That's right. THIRTY!!  On this page down below.  I appreciate my Facebook readers and comments, but I would like them here for today.

So here's what's going to happen.  You're going to comment or I will play this video and only this video EVERYDAY for a month.

Yes.  Until I get thirty comments on this post, I will be setting off the self destruct button on this blog-enator.  I don't need any powers that be telling me what I should post.  I'm posting Dancing Nathaniel for thirty days if you people don't come through.

I wouldn't shoot a kitty... But I would annoy the cranberry sauce out of you.

Have a great weekend, Lurkers.


Introducing, D.

Our family increased by one yesterday.  The case worker dropped off D this evening.  One of the questions was in regards to this blog.  My wife asked would it be a problem if I could post pictures of her on my blog.  The case worker replied, "oh we Google all our background checks and no one reads his blog, so it won't make a difference."

Regardless, we're not allowed to post pictures of D on the internet.   So it seems like I'm making all this up.  I have no proof and it's pretty convenient right?  I've had the most page views this week on all the posts than I have in weeks past.  Well Ladybug decided to help me out and draw her first impression of D.  So until further notice,  this is the official Juggling Eric pictures of D.

After the case worker left I tried holding her but she didn't really want any part of it.  KC was holding her fine, but she would fuss when I tried to cradle her.  KC suggested I hold her a different way and I did.  She seemed to calm down some.  She then said I should tell her about myself.  So I did...

"D... In this house, you'll realize that everyone listens to EVERYTHING I have to say.  There is no arguing with me by any member of the family.  There is no talking back to me and when I am happy everyone is happy."

What happened next was amazing for a four month old.

She looked at me and said the following, "Yeah right, I can just look in your eyes and know whose in charge here, mister."

D:1 - E:0

She fits right on in...


Our Other Kids.

With all this talk about D coming to our house today to stay for a while, I've neglected to really talk about those other kids we already had.

Yeah, they're cool.


Our Day in Court.

Tuesday, KC and I went to the courthouse downtown to be present for the decision to place D in a foster home.  Now I've only been to the courthouse maybe a hand full of times.  Maybe a couple jury duties, one time when my parents were divorcing, and to get our marriage licenses.

I went one time in Houston with my aunt and uncle.  He's with the Houston Police Department and she wanted to see a trial he was testifying at.   I remember her not being real impressed.

Yeah, I wasn't impressed with what I saw either.  I was expecting to see more excitement and beautiful people like in The Practice.  What I saw was depressing.  It was like Wal-Mart Court.

Maybe on another floor where all the murder trials are the pretty people.

Nothing major happened.

Well nothing major which we didn't already know.  D is going to be staying with us and it's on the record and everything.  

I thought it was cool the court stenographer typed my wife's name in shorthand.

In two months the baby's mother and hopefully father will be back in court to check statuses.  I met D's mother and she seems very genuine and determined to do her best to get her daughter back.  She's since left Kristie's cousin and he doesn't know where she is staying. Both KC and I believe this won't last as long as we initially though, a year.

The baby is coming tonight.  We've moved things around.  We graduated Celi to a toddler bed (and she was FANTASTIC!!!) and moved her old crib in our room for D.

So that's where we are right now.

Tonight we'll have SIX kids.


Why Us?

So a couple months ago, I started hearing the stories about the drama that was happening KC's cousin, "J" and girlfriend.  None of it was anything positive.  Abuse had resulted, the girlfriend refused to leave and Child Protective Services took their then three month old baby.

That's the background in a nutshell.

One day shortly after hearing the news, and thinking how stupid the mother must be for giving up her kid for a dude that treats her worse than crap, KC came into the room while I was working.  She sat on the bed and you could tell she had something big to ask.  It was hard to find the words, but she came out and said that her cousin asked us if we could take care of D (the baby).

Real quick.  I am not, have not, nor will I ever be a young woman who ended up in a situation where her boyfriend or whatever abused them in whatever capacity.   I understand it could have been based on whatever control KC's cousin had on her or whatever.  I know it's hard.  I know that much.  But being a parent, no matter how bad you are scared and you have been offered a safe way out and a safe place to stay but choose to give up your kid.  That is stupid.  I'm sorry it is.  Especially when you have complete awareness of what you are doing,

So KC just dropped the bombshell that we are being asked to take care of her cousin's baby.

Hell no!! Not even a rated TV-7 "heck no", but "Hell no"!!

I know she expected this reaction because she wasn't mad or defensive.

You see in the Summer of 09, we were the safety plan for her cousin, "K" and her two kids.  K was a teenage mother with two kids with a dude that wasn't a positive influence on her either.  K and J are siblings.   Which is why J asked KC if we could take care of the baby since we have a history of taking care of their family.

Back to the "hell no!"

My reason for the denial was we are finally in a spot where KC is not pregnant and we are not expecting her to be pregnant anytime soon.  With her not being pregnant, it means she is not on bed rest for an indefinite period of time.  The kids are getting pretty self sufficient and they don't need constant looking after.  I'm finally able to get to those projects around the house that need to be done.  Plus I also want to have more alone time with just KC.

She understood.

PLUS!! I saw this as bailing J out of his situation.  J's been in and out of trouble, mostly in, for years.  I don't want his drama being brought into my family.  I told her there are plenty of foster homes that are ready and able to take care of an infant.  I felt we are not in that place.

I listed a ton of more reasons why we shouldn't.

Why us?

Again, she understood.

I stopped to breath and calm down when KC told me the reason she wanted to consider it.  KC has a giving heart.  She'd give all of herself no matter what the circumstance before thinking about what it could cost her.  I love that about her, but it can also frustrate the cranberry sauce out of me.  She really wanted to keep the baby with the family.  More discussion with me not budging and her being completely understanding.

I told her, "Okay, I will pray about it.  And I promise I won't pray 'God can you please change KC's crazy mind'".

With that she left and I went back to work.  I forget what I prayed, I was just something like, "God?? Whatever...."

Shortly after that, I started focusing on the solution instead of the problem of bringing a new child into the house.  Sure we have five kids, three share a room, and my dad takes up about 175 square feet of the house and we have a ton of laundry.  But that really shouldn't be any reason why we couldn't take care of another kid no matter how long it would be.  In my head I was making it work logistically.

And with that, my mind was changed.


The Powers That Be.

[ - SCENE: Conference Room. Indoors. Mid-Day. Eric Bolton of Juggling Eric and important looking people are having a meeting.-]

Eric:  Can we make this quick guys, I'm supposed to be working?

Blog Executive 1: Will do, baby.  I first wanted to say that we LOVE Juggling Eric.

Blog Executive 2: Love it.

Blog Executive 3: It's amazing.

Eric: Thanks guys.

Blog Executive 1: No problem, baby.  Since you're tapped for time, I'll get right to the point.  We were thinking that we need something to shake up the dynamic of Juggling Eric.  Something big!

Blog Executive 2: Big!!

Blog Executive 3: GINORMOUS!!

Eric: Are the stats that bad guys?  I know the comments have dropped in the past few weeks, but I just attributed that to the holidays.

Blog Executive 1: Yes, Christmas is a bad time for blog comments.

Blog Executive 2: It's a great time for presents though.

Blog Executive 3: Praise Baby Jesus!!!

Eric:  How bad were they?

Blog Executive 1: Well our primary reports do say that you're number one with men aged 36 who have five kids, live in San Antonio and also are named Eric.

Blog Executive 2: Top of the list!

Blog Executive 3: KILLER!!

Eric:  Isn't that just me hitting refresh over and over again to make sure I didn't misspell any words?

Blog Executive 1: Like I said, these are primary reports.

Blog Executive 2: Nothing official.

Blog Executive 3: Pure Cranberry Sauce!!!

Eric:  So what did you guys have in mind?

Blog Executive 1: We're hitting a dry slope in the season of Juggling Eric.  Ladybug isn't producing her Starving Artist work, Christmas is over, there are no birthdays until the second half of the year.  Usually at this time of year a new baby is breaking you in.  So we're thinking about bringing in a new baby.

Blog Executive 2: Stressing you out!

Blog Executive 3: Farting in your general direction!!!

Eric:  Okay.  But KC's not pregnant.  And even if she was to get pregnant tonight, the baby wouldn't be here until August at the earliest.

Blog Executive 1: True.

Blog Executive 2: Very True.

Blog Executive 3: Couldn't be more very true.

Eric:  Can't I just sign Disco up for football or something?  I could do more skits like The Toilet Paper Rod?

Blog Executive 1: That could work, but the overhead....

Blog Executive 2: A little expensive.

Blog Executive 3: We're not Dreamworks.

Eric:  But a baby?  How the heck are you going to just make a baby appear.

Blog Executive 1: We're glad you asked.

Blog Executive 2: So glad.

Blog Executive 3:  Super crazy awesome glad.

Eric:  What......

Blog Executive 1: We found out that KC's cousin lost custody of his daughter.  You and KC have already been approved to be the guardians of her.  You actually have court today to finish all the legalities.  Work already knows.

Blog Executive 2: Wear something nice.

Blog Executive 3: And shave!!

Eric:  I uh... Don't know.. wait, what?!?

Blog Executive 1: Congratulations!

Blog Executive 2: This is fantastic news.

Blog Executive 3: Make your readers proud.

Eric:  ...........................

[ - roll credits - ]


Official Juggling Eric Announcement.

Remember last year on April first when I posted how my wife was pregnant?  Remember how it was a split reaction on who thought it was real and who thought it was an April Fool's prank?

With that in mind, please remember we're not in April yet. so I'm making the official Juggling Eric announcement that we are expecting another baby.

I wish this was the reason for my wife's irritability and lack of understanding in the whole toilet paper rod issue, but it is not the case.

Let me 'splain. No wait, there is too much. Let me sum up.

KC and I will be getting kinship custody of her cousin's five month old daughter.  We've been going through all the hoops and processes in the past month or so seeing if we would be approved, which included background checks and home visits.

I didn't mention my blog because I felt maybe posts like locking the kids in their room, or in what I lovingly call baby cages would be a negative mark on our side.

We found out this morning that we will be getting custody  and we're going to court tomorrow afternoon.  We're told she is not going to be coming home with us tomorrow, but we have the understanding we'll be given a lot of information about assistance and programs we should take advantage of.

This is supposed to be temporary.

Temporary could be a month or it could be years.  Both outcomes KC and I are ready to accept.

Some might think we're crazy. Others might think we're really crazy.   Logistically are we ready?  I have no clue, we haven't been ready for the past four.  But our kids are healthy and hopefully each will be able to have a unique skill that can contribute to society.

The length of time is dependent on the mother's and hopefully father's persistence in taking their required parenting / violence / substance abuse classes.

So without getting into much detail, which I'm sure I could fill more posts later, there you go.

I am now open for any questions.


The Thing.


World Domination...

... one pair of whitey tighties at a time...

Check out this cool ROBOT dresser this dude made from scrap...

I would probably go on record and say this is the coolest thing I've seen since Emsters was born.


The Foofa Conversation.

Yesterday, Celi (2YO) comes up to me and hands me a sheet of paper she had been coloring.

Celi:  Here daddy.

Daddy:  Thanks Belly.. What is it?

Celi:  I draw Foofa.

Daddy:  You drew Foofa?

Not The Drawing. But This is Foofa from Yo Gabba Gabba

Celi:  Yeah, I draw Foofa.

Daddy:  That's very good, baby!  (We encourage the kids even when what they're trying to accomplish  ends up no where near what they feel it is.  I mean it could have been Foofa if she was hit by an ice cream truck and then rinsed off against a curb with a water hose.  Just saying.)

Celi:  I draw Foofa pooping.

Daddy:  I'm sorry, what?

Celi:  I draw Foofa pooping.

Daddy:  You drew Foofa going poop?  (which really explains the way the drawing looks.)

Celi:  Yeah.

Daddy:  That's disturbing Celi Belly.

Celi:  Yeah.


The Toilet Paper Rod.

The following is clip from our reality show, Pretty Dang Exciting.  This is based on an actual conversation my wife and I had last Thursday.

Have a great day my friends.


Possible Changes.

I'm really not happy if I'm stagnant.  This can apply to my current displeasure at work and the fact I can't take a nap without waking up having an OCD fit.  I always need to be doing something.  Honestly if I stop, the children will overtake me.  

They're like zombies.

I'm also a perfectionist.  I can't complete a project and just go, "Hey!  That's pretty good!"  I have to pick it apart and find it's faults and think of how it can be better next time.  I honestly blame my Dad for that little idiosyncratic trait. But I've been looking at this blog and thinking, "it needs more because I'm not happy with it."

I wanted to do a complete blog overhaul for the first of the year, but decided against it and went with a new banner header as a compromise to myself.  I actually started posting more with more frequency and randomness.  I did this because I felt I was limiting myself with the every other day posts.  

At first I thought about just having different blogs for different subjects.  I would have Juggling Eric that dealt with parenting and everyday stuff.  I started ..and see if it sticks to showcase my creative side.  Because two people liked my graphs, I went ahead and dedicated  whole blog to them with Daddy Graphs (which is blocked by my work server for some reason.  I don't know why it's obviously safe for work.  Heck GraphJam where I got the idea from isn't and that's sometimes NSFW.  It's also why I stopped posting the graphs, I didn't want JE to end up getting blocked.).  And I also wanted to post when I had an idea or thought and just share something online and started Randomness and Cynicism based on the posts here by the same name.

I stopped posting on them when I decided I would just put them all on Juggling Eric.  So I'm cool with all that in one place, but I'm not sure if I'm content with the look and platform I'm on right now.

Oh to my wife, mother, mother-in-law, and other family members and friends who read this blog, you can honestly stop reading now.  There's nothing more about kids or how awesome of a husband I am or even about how my wife and I watched Donnie Brasco Saturday night.  It's about blog technical stuff.  You WILL be bored.  This is really for other bloggers to give me their opinions, so forgeddaboutit.

I've been thinking about where Juggling Eric should be located.  I've been thinking about moving it to Wordpress and even Tumblr.  

Blogger has been all right and fairly simple, but I feel limited on the design features and compatibility with other applications.

Wordpress seems overwhelming right now, but I feel I could come to understand it.  I like the mobile function available with WP and how fresh the website themes look.  

I just recently discovered Tumblr.  I like Tumblr because it has that "Twitter Random Style" of posting. I don't know much about it, but it seems really limited on widgets and what not.

So what do my fellow bloggers think?  Is it blogger suicide to change platforms?  If I changed the RSS Feed and you're subscribed to it, would it even make a difference to you?  I've been thinking about buying a domain name too.  If I did that would it change things?

Any thoughts about the subject would be appreciated.