You may or may not recall earlier this year we were given temporary custody of KC's baby cousin.

For those of you who don't like clicking on links here's the story anyways:


KC's cousin is bad news.  Drugs, abuse, theft, victim of drive bys.  Yeah, stuff like that.  His girlfriend got pregnant and he didn't change, but only brought his girlfriend down the same road he was going.  They had a baby and again, things did not change.

CPS was finally called and the baby (at 2 months old) was taken from them (the mother was living with the boyfriend and would not/could not move) and placed in a shelter.  KC's cousin called us and asked if we could take care of the baby.  KC was like, I'll talk to Eric.  Eric was like "Aw Hell Naw".

Eventually I thought of reasons why it was best, versus why it wouldn't work.  So in the middle of January, the baby moved into an already crowded Boltonshire.


When the baby moved in, we were told we could not post pictures or information on the internet.  Even though three people read my blog (two of them being my mother and mother-in-law), it didn't make a difference, I could not talk about the baby in this forum.  But when I shared the story on here, we called her "D".

As hard as it was not to include her in the heroic adventures of the Bolton Clan.  I purposely negated her from the stories aside from a brief mention.  It was hard omitting that part of my life since I pretty much put it all out here in some form or another.  It hindered my blogging on account of it.

Well the past nine months have been challenging.   Right when we were not pregnant for an entire year, we got another infant to change the dynamic of the family.  Everyone adjusted great.  The kids love their cousin and treat her just like they do each other.

Which is good and possibly bruising.

KC has been AMAZING during this entire time.  She treated D as one of her own.  Hugging and kissing and getting frustrated with her just like she would one of the kids.  D became a member of our family and didn't know any better.

We were there when she rolled over for the first time.  When she sat up for the first time.  Her first time crawling, standing, taking steps, falling down, and eventually walking.

We were also there for ear infections, tubes, breathing treatments, and teething.

Oh that dang teething.  

That kid cut 32 teeth in the past six months and she did not like it.

Monday was her birthday and she turned 1.  We had a little party for her like we do the other kids.  Tuesday she had her 12 month check up and she's doing fine.

Yesterday was also her last day with us.

Her mother completed all of her mandatory classes in order to be given full custody of D again.  She's dropped KC's cousin (who is still bad news) and is doing well.

The feeling of her leaving was bittersweet.  On one hand, with one less baby  in the house (especially one who can be VERY needy) it gives us, especially KC, more time to focus on our major plans for the family.  The other hand was, well she's been part of the family and she is going to be dearly missed.

By the way, her name is Destiny.

It was very hard for my wife, she did not want to let her go.  But we extending membership of our family to include Destiny and her mother.  I don't see it as her going away forever.  She's a family member who we will see often because of the bond between us and her.  She'll be invited to the kids' birthday parties, to Thanksgivings and Christmases.

It's not "Good Bye", it's "See you soon."

And for the record, my wife is amazing.  She did an outstanding job taking care of Destiny.  Destiny is so much better today because of her and her decision to fight for the baby almost a year ago.  I know the foundations that were laid this year for Destiny will no doubt be carried on with her for the rest of her life.

Have a great day my friends.



The fine folks over at Mom Central tapped me to partake in a series of posts in regards to the Brother P-Touch label maker.  Mom Central's first request is that we put the durability of the labels to a test.

I'm assuming Mom Central knows about the residents of Boltonshire and how vacation beach houses have been devastated in our wake.  I asked them if they knew the power of the Fatal Five.  They acknowledged and almost taunted a throw down between the two parties.

Challenge Accepted!!!

I'm a professional wrestling fan.  So I only thought it be fitting if I took the challenger, the P-Touch Label affixed to a piece of plexi-glass and ran it through the DURABILITY GAUNTLET OF DOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!

The DURABILITY GAUNTLET OF DOOOOOOOOOOOM consists of a scrub brush, a sponge, nail polish remover and clorox detergent.  All items were provided by Brother for testing.


The dry scrub brush attacked the label in such a way as to pick the corners from the glass.  In hopes a corner could be exposed and the advantage taken on the weakened side. After a few minutes and the development of carpel-tunnel syndrome.  The scrub brush gave up and threw in the towel.


After seeing how ineffective Scrub Brush was against the label, the dry Sponge tried the same attack with the same results.


Since a technical attack was not very productive.  La Fresh Travel Wipe Nail Polish Remover tried to attack the actual ink on the label.    The wiping was intense, but it was to no avail.  There was not even a smear of the ink.  The Wipe took herself out of contention with no hope of a comeback.


Sponge decided to try his hat with Label again, but this time brought his friend Mr. Clorox.  Clorox sprinkled himself over the label first dry then scrub brush joined in the fight as well.  Still unable to make any dent in Label's defense, they threw some water over Detergent in hopes of more damage.  

Nothing.  Sponge gave up and called for Scrub Brush to try and finish the job.


Scrub Brush tried to take over on the wet detergent where Sponge left off.  Still suffering from the onset of Carpal Tunnel, Scrub Brush was wise to give up and convince Clorox to do the same.  Label could not be stopped.

So with the items in the P-Touch Test Pack, none of the items were able to take down P-Touch Label.  I might go as far and coin the pun, "P-Touch is P-Tough".  

So when you use the labels from the Brother P-Touch Label Maker, you can rest assured the labels, once affixed will not come off from basic household chemical items or cleaning utensils.  So you can post your labels in high traffic areas and feel safe they will not come off or smeared.

Now, I'm also a fan of MythBusters.  You know, the show they try to recreate a scenario to see if something is a myth, plausible or confirmed true.  At the end of the shows when something is confirmed true and it's confirmed with explosions, they like to go all out and just BLOW THE CRAP OUT OF IT ANYWAYS!!!!

So with that in mind... I called in some friends or mine to go against P-Touch Label in a non-sanctioned Mom Central/Brother test.

Again, this is non-sanctioned and obviously not in the realistic intended environment to use a P-Touch Label Maker.    It's just my dark desire to BLOW THE CRAP OUT OF IT ANYWAYS!!!

I take no credit if my kids develop this same desire.

“I wrote this review while participating in a campaign by Mom Central Consulting on behalf of Brother P-Touch and received a product and gift card to facilitate my review and a promotional item to thank me for taking the time to participate.”

This is the first part of the series of Brother P-Touch Label Maker Reviews.


Marooned - Part 1

Erik Maroon sat in seat 42C of his transcontinental direct flight from Rome to Dehli having a conversation with his friend Edward Stevens across the aisle. 
"Are you crazy?  John Cena does not need a title when facing the Rock at Wrestle Mania next year.  What's going to happen when Rocky wins?  Is he going to take the title and wear it for the Tooth Fairy 2??" Erik mocked.
"No!!" Ed responded, "He'll give it back or pass it down or something."
"If I didn't know you, I'd figure you were retarded.  I'm going to hit the head, you cool?"
"Yeah, hurry up.  We've been up here for a couple hours already and I need to drain the main vein if you know what I mean."
"Dude, I'm starting to believe you really are retarded."
Erik stood up from his seat and stretched out for a second before walking back to the restroom.  He passed the group of college missionaries grouped together that boarded with him in Rome.  He smiled at a cute girl many years his younger and thought to himself what a shame it is about her commitment to follow God.  He talked to a few of them at DiVinci Airport in Rome and found out they're going to be setting up churches in some of the villages during the summer months.  There was a lot of buzz between them on account the plane was now over Israel.
They acted just like his Dad and Kaci.  He just couldn't get behind them or feel encouraged by them after what he's gone through and everything he's lost.
Not anymore.
A male missionary started to stand before Erik approached his seat.  He sat back down to let Erik pass.  Their eyes locked.  Erik gave him a "what's up" look, while he gave Erik a "stay out of my business" look in return. 
Erik got to the restroom and gave one last look down the length of the cabin before going inside.  He checked his phone and saw he has a message from Savannah.
"Geez.. Come on chick.. I'm working!!!   De-Leted!!!"
As he was deleting he got another message from the office.
What the hell??!
He  hears a scream coming from the cabin.  Erik bursts open the door to see all hell breaking loose.
"FEDERAL AIR MARSHALL!!" Ed yells with a gun pointing at the male missionary with one of "his sisters in Christ" as a human shield.
Erik draws his gun, identifies himself as an air marshal as well and demands everyone stay seated.  A hero from behind the "missionary" tries to surprise him from behind but is shot down by one of two more men sitting towards the front of the cabin. 
They rush the cockpit, plant a small explosive and blow the lock.  They kick the door open and Erik hears some yelling with thick accents followed by two gunshots.  The plane starts to shake as they enter the cockpit and slam the door.
Erik's eyes start to search the cabin to see if anyone else is involved in this.  Three people are already down and he has no control of the situation.  People are screaming and the plane he was in charge of just got hijacked.  He has to get it back.
The missionary pulls a small gun and shoots Ed dead center in his chest.
Ed falls.
Erik watches as his partner of the past six years goes down.
It feels like an eternity, but he regains his composure before Ed's assailant lifts his gun in his direction.
Unlike Ed, Erik didn't think the sister missionary was too close, and now that he had a clear line of sight took "her brother" out with a headshot between the eyes.  A business man pulls her out of the aisle so Erik can get to the cockpit.
It was was a warning of protection not a threat.  He didn't want to shoot anyone that didn't need to be.
He steps over Ed's body and that of the "missionary".  The plane starts to make a sharp descent and Erik stumbles forward over the hero.  He approaches the cockpit, gun at a ready position.  Before he can get to the door, there's a gunshot.  Erik slams to the side of the wall to avoid any gunfire.  Then two more shots almost simultaneously shoot off.  The planes almost jumps in the air and feels like it's going nose first into the ground.
He kicks opens the door to see the pilot and co-pilot dead as well as the two terrorists from self inflicted gunshots to their head.  Erik pulls them from their seats...
Erik turns around to see the female missionary previously being held hostage standing six feet from the cockpit with a gun in her hand.  Her gun drops and she falls on her face dead.
Down the aisle, Ed holds on to a seat as he lowers his smoking weapon. 
Erik sits at the controls to try to pull back and regain the altitude they're losing.
Nothing.  The sticks are dead and the ground is getting closer.  He thinks of how he failed.  His mind races to his family.  His father.  His mother.  He has to wonder if he'll see her soon?  He thinks of Kaci and Michael.  He pulls back on the controls more letting out a scream of defeated anguish as there is still no change.
He looks back into the cabin and sees the remaining missionaries out of their seats praying with people. 
You have to be kidding me. 
Erik laughed,  "We'll it's going to take a miracle from God to stop this plane from becoming a fireball in the Israel desert."
He pulled back in frustration and the plane moved.  In shock Erik moved it some more and it began to straighten out.  He was still descending and losing altitude too fast.  The ground was still getting closer.  They were still going to die.  There was no way around it.  It's just a matter of where they died that Erik had control of.  He had minimal control of the plane and he was not going to let it crash in a populated area.
The creeks became larger and could count the sheep in the fields.  He felt sorry what he wasn't able to do.  He was sorry for how he left Kaci.  He always loved her and never stopped thinking about her, even when he was with Savannah.  He hopes he made them proud.
Brushing the ground, Erik lets out another scream and pulls back on the controls. 
"I'm sorry God."
The plane slams into the ground and the grinding noise is deafening.   One of the starboard engines catches fire and explodes.  Friction from the ground cases the fuselage to burst in flames as the remaining engines explode.  The entire plane is engulfed in flame and screams in destruction as it becomes a rolling fireball in the desert.  
The plane no longer exists, only fire.


How to Fix Your Washing Machine

Earlier this year, I shared my mad A/C repairing skills with you guys.  Today, I bring you another Juggling Eric "How To"...

STEP 1: Have your wife call you while you're in the middle of a meeting.

STEP 2: Ignore the call because you are in the middle of a meeting.

STEP 3: Receive a text from your wife saying "i need you to call now"

STEP 4: Reply stating you are in the middle of a meeting and can't get up and leave, but ask what is going on.

STEP 5: The next text from her says the washing machine won't drain or  spin and there are clothes in the water.

STEP 6: Send a troubleshooting text asking if the machine is still plugged in, the knob is pulled out, or the "button that is pushed when the lid is closed thing" can be pushed.

STEP 7: Reply from her states none of that works.

STEP 8: Advise you'll look at it when you get home and in the meantime the clothes will not be harmed floating in the water.

STEP 9: Get home, look at the machine and see that the "button that is pushed when the lid is closed thing" is no longer visible.

STEP 10: Reach under the top of the washer to feel for the "button that is pushed when the lid is closed thing" and see if it can be moved back in position.

STEP 11: Realize the "button that is pushed when the lid is closed thing" is no longer existant and feel around to find a switch to make the washer drain.

STEP 12: Watch the basin empty and watch as it spins the clothes and hope your thumb does not get ripped off.

STEP 13: Imagine your thumb being ripped off and hearing your wife say "this is something you would do."

STEP 14: Remember you were given a newer washer a couple months prior that you have not had time to install.

STEP 15: Advise your wife she can't do clothes until this weekend after you install the other washer.

STEP 16: Watch your clothes pile up because you have a family of eight.

STEP 17: Saturday morning realize you should really have a dolly to move the washers and you don't have one.

STEP 18: Borrow one from your father in law.

STEP 19: Disconnect the old washer, wheel it outside, toss it off a cliff and then blow it up with some C4 sitting around the house.

STEP 20:  Wheel the newer washer in and connect everything.

STEP 21: Turn on the water and realize this newer washer has more problems than the old one had.

STEP 22:  Realize you should have waited on destroying the old washer before finding out if the new one actually worked or not.

STEP 23:  Salvage the old washer and see if you can just replace the "button that is pushed when the lid is closed thing" from the newer washer with the old washer.

STEP 24:  Find out it would have been too easy for them to be compatible.

STEP 25:  Go to Sears and see if they have any "button that is pushed when the lid is closed things" for a Kenmore from 1913.

STEP 26:  Place the "button that is pushed when the lid is closed thing" on the counter and have the lady at the counter know exactly what it is and finds a replacement.

STEP 27:  Find out the "button that is pushed when the lid is closed thing" is actually called an "Actuator".

STEP 28:  Take it back home and realize you have no idea how it goes back on because you pulled it out blind.

STEP 29:  Have your wife ask you, "just put it back in the way you took it out".

STEP 30:  Tell her to see step 28.

STEP 31:  Find a way to rig it so it'll work for the time being.

STEP 32:  Know better because you will more than likely be getting another text at an inopportune time with an "I told you so" attachment.

STEP 33:  Remove the side panel to try and figure it out.

STEP 34: Figure it out.

STEP 35: Disconnect the newer washer, wheel it outside, drop it off the cliff and blow it up with the remaining C4.

STEP 36:  Wheel the original fixed washing machine, back inside and install.

STEP 37:  Celebrate your mad washing machine repair skills.

STEP 38:Tell your wife to get back to work. 

* - yeah right.


Who is Simon Movie? Movie Review

I was given a chance to view an advance screening of Who is Simon Miller? [website], the latest collaboration between Wal-Mart and Proctor and Gamble and their Family Movie Night [facebook].  The movie will premiere on Saturday August 6th, on NBC at 8PM/7PM central.  P&G’s movies are good in quality with regards to production and morals.  Who is Simon Miller? focuses on the ability to trust one another.

The movie begins on the streets of a European country in the middle of a chase you’d see in a Jason Bourne movie.  During the chase, the chaser’s phone rings and he starts having a nonchalant conversation with his wife back in the states about what time he’s going to be home.  It was during this part it reminded me of True Lies.

To the world and to his family, Simon Miller is a big shot geologist.  But when he’s not pretending to save the world from rock formations, he’s actually saving the world via a super secret “answers only to the executive branch” agency.

Simon comes home from his covert operation only to be called out again.  His wife and teenage kids are used to his coming and goings and while it’s frustrating, they don’t think anything of it.

It’s not until Simon is ambushed on a mission and “off the grid” when his family gets worried.  They do a little digging and find out his secret (finding passports under different names and a garage full of sweet cars) and go looking for him.

The wife is totally understanding with the cache of fake id’s and seemingly other life he’s living, but does not believe her daughter did not cheat on a test. The remainder of the movie is a “who can you trust” thriller.

Aside from the one flaw about mom believing dad’s secret life more than her daughter’s admission of not cheating, you have a pretty good action, thriller, non-violent family movie.

“I wrote this review while participating in a campaign by Dad Central Consulting on behalf of P&G and received a promotional item to thank me for taking the time to participate.”