Poop Quiz.


Pop Quiz Hot Shot!  You have a new born baby, babies like to poop.  Their legs are so stinkin' strong, it's like they were training to be technical wrestlers in the womb. They're squirming and moving and the crap generic store brand diapers your "friend" at work gave you just can't  keep everything in. What do you do? WHAT DO YOU DO?!?!?!

The answer is not to shoot the hostage.

The answer is to use Huggies Snug & Dry Diapers.  Huggies [ Facebook / Twitter ] has made improvements to their Snug & Dry Diapers (because you can never be to snug and / or dry).  Poop and pee stay in a lot better than before (while I didn't have that much of a problem before, because I would change their diapers). But it  does come in handy when Grandpa Dan is watching the kids and he doesn't "get around" to changing their diapers before we get home, because they're on his bed watching Netflix, eating cotton candy, and drinking soda.

Another Pop Quiz Hot Shot!  Grandpa Dan has just given your newborn baby cotton candy and soda.  They're pooping like the Jericho Missle System presentation in Iron Man (it's gross because it's true). Poop is everywhere.  What do you do?  WHAT DO YOU DO?!?!?!

The answer is not to shoot Grandpa Dan.

The answer is to use Huggies Wipes to clean all that baby poop up.  While I've noticed nothing different in the wipes given to me as a sample, I've always enjoyed Huggies Wipes better than others, mainly because the wipes are folded in a way the next one pops up when you pull the top one through the wipes box hole.  Not like those generic store bought ones your "friend" at work bought with their stupid diapers.  Those wipes are just laid on top of one another and they don't pop up when you get the top one thru.  So you have to reach in the box for another, but you have to hurry because the Jericho Missle System from Iron Man is about to reload.

Yet Another Pop Quiz Hot Shot!  Do you pronouce it "wipes" or "wipe-eese"?

If you said "wipes", you're wrong!!!!  It's "wipe-eese".

Last Pop Quiz Hot Shot!  You've got your newborn and you're hanging out with your friend from work and he's attacked by a zombie and bitten.  The zombie won't let him go.  You have your gun ready to go.  What do you do?  WHAT DO YOU DO?!?!

The answer is to shoot the hostage.  One because he's already been infected and he's as good as dead anyways.   And two because he bought you those crap generic store bought diapers and wipe-eese and not only is there a zombie attacking, you're now covered in newborn poop.



I participated in a campaign on behalf of MomCentral for Huggies. I received product samples to facilitate my review and a promotional item to thank me for participating

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Home.

When we're in the Dragon Wagon, my kids have a few songs they request to hear.  The below video contains one of those songs.  Building 429's, Where I Belong.


With the sudden passing of our church's pastor Dave Bell, shock is still set in. On Facebook, friends are changing their profile picture to worship album covers he was a part of and leaving heart broken and encouraging posts about their pastor, spiritual father, and friend.

While his congregation mourns their loss, it is not uncommon for people to ask "How could God let this happen?" or "Why did God allow this?  Pastor Bell was only 57."  The simple blanket answer that people are using for encouragement is, "It was just his time."

Then you have the questions coming from his wife, sons and family.  I'm sure they're asking God how He could take away the foundation of their family.  A fifteen year old boy has every right to question God about taking his father away from him.  My simple answer to them would be, "I don't know."

There is nothing wrong with questioning God about His actions.  Before his capture and death, Jesus was in the Garden of Gethsemane and asks God if it was possible the cup be passed from Him.

God could have done so.  God could have said, "Never mind, this is too much to ask of one man.  This is not where he belongs."  But He didn't.  Jesus fulfilled His purpose and created a way for man to have a relationship, live and reign forever with  God.  It was up to his followers, his apostles to rise up and make sure everyone knew the message.

God very well could have breathed life back into Pastor Bell yesterday morning.  God knew no one expected him to die before his Sunday message.  Pastor Bell's purpose and vision for his church and how they would advance the body of Christ was established and set fourth well before yesterday.

Dave Bell is home now.  He served the Lord during his short life on earth.  Those of us from church and his family can be assured we will see him again in Heaven, because that is where we ultimately belong.

Have a blessed day my friends.

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David Bell.

Sunday mornings can be crazy here in Boltonshire.  We try to get everyone ready and out the door so we can get to church by 10:30.  At 10:30 they start praise and worship, but at 10:30 they also stop serving free coffee.  Sure I can get free coffee at work every morning, but work doesn't have French Vanilla Creamer. Now being an expert at knowing my family, I knew there was not a chance in the world we were making it by 10:30 today.  My second option required us to be at a Valero by 10:00,  When the Spurs when a championship game, Valero gives out free coffee.  We weren't going to make that either.  So MaddSkillz and I left while KC was in the shower and picked up some coffee swag.  We made it to church a little past 10:30 and the kids minus Ladybug were in their classes.

Everything was going along per usual.  Praise and Worship was going along fine as it lead into communion.  I noticed our pastor, Dave Bell, wasn't in the sanctuary just yet.  I didn't think much of it, I'm assuming most of us weren't either, because it is not unlike him to come down the hill (the sanctuary is down a hill/driveway from the office and old church building) from his office in the middle of praise and worship.

Pastor Bell's eldest son, Matt was on stage and just started talking when one of the elders ran up, grabbed the microphone and asked if anyone knew CPR.  Maybe a half people jumped up and followed him out the door.  The whole congregation started praying.  We had no idea who we were praying for, until Matt had said, "It might be my dad..."

Everyone seemed to stop for a second, wrap the idea around the fact their spiritual leader was in jeopardy, and then started praying specifically for Pastor Bell.

The prayers didn't mean more know because we were praying for our pastor and not some random person, but prayer is a weapon.  If you have a gun and know you have to shoot at something in a general area, but do not know what or what you're shooting, it's harder to hit your intended target.  When you pray specifically for something or someone, you have a better chance of hitting your intended target.

A few minutes later, we saw an ambulance and firetruck rush by the window and the prayers continued.

Another few minutes later, the same elder who asked for the CPR help came and told us Pastor Bell had passed away.  Some of those standing in prayer fell into their seats.  Screams of agony and loss were heard.  Tears started to fall.  Confusion of why and how could something like this happen.

I saw him last week when I had to run to the car real quick during praise and worship, when he was making his way to the sanctuary.  He asked me how The Emsters was doing.  The Emsters had been complaining of headaches for two months and we have been going through a lot in trying to rule out what specially was wrong.  We had sent a prayer request to some friends of ours and it had gotten up to him.

I say "up to him" because in my previous church, I was not used to individual interaction with the Pastor.  I had went to a "mega church".  I learned a lot there, but we weren't feeling as we belonged.  It seemed the business of being a mega church outweighed the specific individual relationships with the congregation.  The fact that Pastor Bell, was praying specifically for my daughter and what was wrong meant EVERYTHING to me.  It wasn't a blanket prayer of health and wellness towards you and your family.  It was that specific prayer as a weapon I was talking about.

We felt like part of a family from the first day were showed up there.  Every Sunday Pastor Bell would tell the congregation he loved us.  You can take that how you want.  You can take it like he "has" to say it because he's the pastor, or you can take it like he really does feel that way.  With the way he and his church has welcomed and accepted my family the way even some friends and family do not, means he genuinely meant it.

He and his wife, Jodi have five sons. Matthew, Michael, Mark, Micah, and Mitchell.  Matt is the oldest at 30 (I think) and Mitchell is a year younger than MaddSkillz.  He was a blessed man and you could see it through his sons, daughter-in-laws, and grandchildren.

Psalm 127:4-5 says "Like arrows in the hands of a warrior are children born in one's youth.  Blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them."

This reflects Pastor Bell's family perfectly.  His quiver was full of them.  As well with the hundreds of people who have grown to consider him their spiritual father and leader.  They too were all arrows in his very large quiver.

God Bless you Pastor Dave Bell.  Your love and teachings meant everything to me and my family.

When you see Adam.  Kick him in the shins for me would you?



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Once Upon A Time In Boltonshire [Week One]

I guess I'm trying to get back into blogging.  I was kind of burned out from it, plus my kids got kind of boring.  So while I try to establish a routine, I'll post a previous blog, part or in whole.  Usually it will be something I find comical and maybe comment on how things have or have not changed.

From Weekend Wrap Up Monday 8/09/09


I make the call to my grandparents and let them know that we made it back in town safely. My grandmother tells me that she found one of Ladybug's Care Bears. She said that she'll take care of it until we come back. I tell this to my daughter who has a break down. "We forgot Harmony Bear", I said. 

"WE NEED TO GO GET IT!!" "MY BEAR!!!" 

"HARRRRRRRMONNNNNNNYYYYYYyyyyyyyyyy......."

The wife was wondering why I even said anything. She has over TWENTY Care Bears and she wouldn't have noticed. I realized she was right. So, before I put my daughter down to sleep Sunday night, I go thru her bears and there's Harmony Bear. I then realize that we didn't leave Harmony, we left "Share Bear." So, I look like the hero when I bring in Harmony Bear. I'm not going to mention Share Bear at all. If the kid couldn't remember that she didn't take Harmony Bear, she's not going to remember that she actually took Share Bear.

And Now Today...
Yeah... This will totally still happen today if we left a bear somewhere.  Which is why I learned my lesson and buy double of all the things they get.

Just in case.

Have a great weekend my friends.

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Six Pounds.

Twelve months ago, there were four kids in our house that were in diapers.  Disco, Celi, Emsters and Destiny.  Sometimes we'd skip health insurance payments, just to buy diapers.

But I always had my daily Dr Pepper!!!

So we scared Disco with the Poop Monster eating his butt off last summer and the intervention was a success.  He joined Team Tighty Whitey and we were down to three.

We had continuous health coverage now, just not car insurance.

But I always had my daily Dr Pepper!!!

In August, Destiny left along with her diapers and we were down to two.

Now I could have TWO daily Dr Peppers!!!

We've been trying to get Celi on the pot for a while now (the toilet, not the marijuana), but she was scared and did not want anything to do with the toilet.  Maybe she heard the story about the Poop Monster and took it the wrong way.

So at the last diaper purchase, I told Celi this would be her last package of diapers.  When they run out, she will have to start panties.  When I told her this, she was cool.  When her mother told her, she got pissed.  On Sunday the diapers ran out and Monday morning KC started the "training".

Celi was scared of peeing without a diaper on.  Kids just love sitting in their own waste apparently.  They called me and I promised her I would get her something that worked on her older sister getting her trained.



Yes, SIX POUNDS OF GUMMY BEARS!!!

The bribery worked because less than an hour later, I got this picture.



Look how excited she is!!!  Don't worry, it's not really pee.  If I can help make a Superman painting, I can make food coloring and water look like pee.

Just joking, it really is pee.

MY DAUGHTER'S PEE IS ON THE INTERNETS FOREVER!!!

After the initial pee in the potty, it was on like Comic-Con!  She's been going herself without us having to remind her to go to the restroom.  So now all we have left is Emsters.  I think she'll be easy, we'll have her scared of the Poop Monster by Christmas.

... and guess who get's three daily Dr Peppers now!!

Have a great day my friends.

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Man of Steel

So MaddSkillz had to do a project for class.  He had to take a painting by someone, anyone, doesn't matter and then recreate it with himself as the focus.

All without photoshop.

So he chose a painting entitled "Man of Steel" by Mel Ramos.


So he [read "WE"] had to make it work.  Again, all without photoshop.

Here's what we finished....


I think it came out pretty dang good.  We used candle motives as the rivets insulation board for the hull.  The cracks in our hull were due to it being windy the night we bought the board and it folded in half on us.  Sure we didn't take MaddSkillz height into proportion with the size of the hull, but he should get a close to perfect grade if you ask me.

Oh, and a Superman costume does not come with a yellow belt, so that "belt" is a yellow shirt belonging to MaddSkillz held together in the back with duct tape, with sharpie as the "buckle".

I know I haven't posted in forever, but thought my three readers might enjoy this.

Have a great day my friends.

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