DAD HACKS #96


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DAD HACKS #79


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DAD HACKS #59


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DAD HACKS #15


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DAD HACKS #82


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DAD HACKS #42


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DAD HACKS #39


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DAD HACKS #24


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Hashtag Thor

Is that Thor Thor??



It was announced yesterday that a major Marvel comic book hero is now a female.  There are few details at this time, but Thor the God of Thunder will now be portrayed in the comics by a woman.  Thor #1 will feature a brand new God of Thunder (he's not getting any gender altercations or anything).  The comic is set for release this fall.

Now the conservative side of me feels this may be strictly for the PC crowd to include more female comic characters in bigger roles.  This has upset a lot of the comic geeks on the internet.  And I can see where they’re coming from.

Comic Book Purest on the web hate almost everything about change in a comic or comic character.   They hate when an actor is announced to play the title character in an upcoming movie adaptation.  They sit behind their monitors and keyboards, and just complain and complain about how different or how character is and how much the movie is going to suck.

They do the same when a new direction is announced in comics.

Now with Lady Thor?

Lady Thor


I’m actually okay with it and here’s two reasons why.

The First Reason


Loreli, Araceli, Emma, and Madeline.

My four daughters.

Loreli likes comics. Emma likes Doctor Who. Araceli wants to like them both, but says she likes them to fit in.  Maddy is too small right now, but she’ll more than likely follow suit.

A few years ago, I came into possession of about 2000 comic books dating from the late sixties to the early eighties.  I was only able to obtain Marvel comics, but I’m assuming this guy had the same range of DC too.  But in this cache of comics, there were comics I was not going to read ever.

Those were She-Hulk, Ms Marvel and Spider-Woman.

Yes they were all women, that could have been the reason why I didn’t read them.  But honestly, I wasn’t interested in their stories.  Back then they were pretty much just the female version of their male counterpart. 

Hulk, Captain America and Spider-Man.

So I offered them up to my kids.  Loreli took them all.

What I didn’t realize being a guy and always subjecting my daughter to my geeky male heroes -  Spider-Man, Batman, Indiana Jones, Star Wars, etc. I didn’t give her any lady geek heroes to look up to.

She had them now.

While they may not be as mainstream as Hulk, Captain America and Spider-Man, they were to her and her sisters.

So If Lady Thor gives them something to look up to and their a positive role model.  Then I’m okay with it.

The Second Reason


The second reason I’m okay with it is based on money.

While I have no idea how Lady Thor will come into being.  My theory is that Thor Thor (you say things twice when you mean the original one or to stress importance)…

I’m hungry, but not hungry hungry.

... did something stupid and doesn’t feel he is worthy enough to wield Mjolnor, his Hammer.  So he drops his hammer in a fit of depression and Lady picks it up becoming Lady Thor.

It is a great  way to tell a different story from a character that’s been in comics for over 50 years.  But what those internet haters don’t like to do, they don’t like to think anywhere past their own hate. 

The success of comic books lead way to comic book adapted movies.  More people see movies than read comics.  Thor Thor has been in three Marvel Movies as a dude.  He is also going to be in Avengers 2 next summer…

As a dude.

When Comic Book Movies come out and they have a different variation of a character from the books, the comic books seem to follow suit.  It’s their way of making the transition easy for new readers to recognize a character they saw on the big screen.

In the comics, Wolverine originally was a short and not very handsome.  In X-Men:  The Movie we were introduced to Hugh Jackman.  Hugh is the opposite.  After X-Men:  The Movie, Wolverine got a little more handsome.

We were introduced to Agent Coulson (played by Clark Gregg)  in the movie, Iron Man.  After that he showed up in the Thor and Avengers movies as well.  He eventually became a recurring character in the comics.

So, Thor Thor in the movies is a dude.  Lady Thor isn’t.  Since Avengers 2 is going to be a 2 hour commercial for Marvel Comics, it’s safe to say if Marvel wants to keep collecting that cash, Lady Thor will change back to Thor Thor by next summer. 

Because there’s going to be someone who goes, “Hey, I like that Thor! I want to go read about him.”  He goes to the comic store and picks up the current issue and on the front of the cover he sees Thor has breasts. “Hey this isn’t Thor Thor!!!”

Is Lady Thor going to be gone forever once Thor Thor comes back?

Probably not, it’s probably a way to introduce a new character as well as get in some new readers before the movie comes out.

It’s not a terrible thing.


So internet, get over it!

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DAD HACKS #22


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Hashtag Dork

Made With Pallet Wood!!


Did you make it back?

The results of the soft opening are mixed.  While I never get comments as it is, I'm never sure how it's taken.  I get likes on the shares on Facebook, but no one really says anything.  So I'm assuming they're just making me feel decent with their sympathy likes…

I even have to ask my wife later if she read it.

I would think she comes out and just shares with me the excitement of reading a post written by her husband.  I mean she wakes me up, seriously the other night she wakes me up right when I was about to get into REM sleep.  It was some dude doing a review on some deodorant and how much the deodorant sucked and how he still stinks after using it. When all of a sudden he “realizes” he’s forgotten to take off the deodorant protector cap after two weeks. 

Uhhhhhh???

By Gawd it was the funniest thing she’s even seen while lying in bed with her husband right when he was about to get into REM sleep!!!!

I guess that’s a good thing.

“You should probably change it to ‘Hashtag Dork’”

She tells me when I ask her if she's read it..

I appreciate that.

Moving on.


I had to purposely go on.  I actually deleted a sentence that would have sent me off track again.  I’ll go over that later on I hope.  But I want to at least finish something I plan on doing on this blog.  Even if it wasn’t as funny as the Deodorant Guy.

I said I was moving on….


Whether I keep Hashtag Bolton or change it to Hashtag Dork I wanted to jump into blogging instead of making sure everything is set up before the “GRAND OPENING”.    I’m a bit of a perfectionist and I knew if I made sure everything was perfect before I started writing the posts again, I would have never gotten around to a post.  I would have spent days customizing the perfect template only to find out that nothing goes with my intended theme.  So I’m just throwing it all against the wall to see if it sticks.

Honestly it doesn’t matter.  Most of you will probably be reading this on a mobile device and only see the mobile version anyways.  Or you’re reading this years from now when I finally perfected it and have no idea what it looked like originally.

But I added a bunch of social media sites on  the right hand side. 

Social Media pages are set up by bloggers to inflate their ego.  It has to be.  Why else would they want you to follow them on all their social media sites?  The more followers they have on their pages the more important they are.  If you don’t have an army of followers, you end up a D-List Dad Blogger.

Plus if you want companies and brands to get a hold of you and want you to shill their products, you have to have a lot of followers. 

You appear more important when you have a lot of documented followers.

So with that, I’m asking you to follow me on the following sites.

Hashtag Bolton Facebook Fan Page – Here you will get the links to the posts you see here.  Yeah I know, why do I need to be a fan of Hashtag Bolton when I can just come here and get the same posts? 

You just do, okay?  Maybe you want to share it.  Facebook has that share button you can just share with your timeline.  Your friends honestly will appreciate it.  They’ll wake up their husbands right when they’re into their REM sleep!!

Eric’s Twitter – Same thing as Facebook.  Except WITH MORE HASHTAGS!!!  Now there could be some people who are on Twitter who are not on Facebook.  They like to keep issues with friend’s baby momma drama to only 140 characters.  But follow me on Twitter and you could get me baby momma drama FREE!!

Google + Page – This one, I’m asking a lot from you.  I assume most of you do not even know you have a Google Plus account.  A recent survey from SupremoMaximussen confirms my assumptions. 

 
See!!!


Also, who the heck has Google Plus that doesn’t already have Facebook?  I don’t know.  But the A-Listers do it, I’m asking you to just do it to.  Por Favor.

Eric’s Instagram – Want to know what I’m about to eat?  Am I drinking a Monster Energy Drink, Dr Pepper or Valero Coffee?  Maybe it’s all three at the same time?!?  You’ll never know if you’re not following my food on Instagram.

Hashtag Bolton on Pinterest – Here you can see how I like all these other people who like other people’s liking of someone who turned a wooden pallet into a Monster Truck.

Ok that’s it for now.  I think I have the You Tube link on the sidebar too, but I wasn’t able to configure it the way I wanted.  So you are not obligated to click and follow that one yet.

Ugh.  I just realized, I’m pretty boring when I have an agenda and want to go through with it by staying on course. 



I’ll promise to go off an a tangent next time.

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DAD HACKS #19


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The Ninja Kitty Blog



Did you come back after that disaster yesterday?

That is assuming you were actually here on day one.

I'm sure there were people who were like, "ooooooookay, obsess much?"

No, I don't.  I hadn't even thought of David Schwimmer since Madagascar 2.

I didn't see Madagascar 3.

I was afraid that since the NSA taps My Galaxy 3 Note, they probably saw this page too.  There's some NSA guy working in their basement having to look at blogs all day to determine if they're a threat to the President or any influential democratic party contributor.

"Nope, it's just a David Schwimmer Fan Blog.  All Clear!!!"

Whew.

It would have been a different story if I went the Baldwin Brothers route yesterday and said I was the Stephen Baldwin of the Dad Bloggers. I'd have NSA breaking down my front door for sure.

Now to explain the Ninja Kitty that you see above.

Again, after the David Schwimmer rant, I looked at my new blog front page and saw this:

The Official Un-Official Fan Blog of David Milhouse Schwimmer

The NSA Basement Guy was right!!

This does look like a David Schwimmer Fan Blog and I'm just guessing at his middle name.  I guess I could go back to IMDB or Wikipedia and look it up, but then I'm putting more effort into this non-David Milhouse Schwimmer blog than I should.

Ugh...

Since it's was clearly obvious yesterday, I have no clear purpose of this blog yet, I have to do some damage control to make it look like it's anything but a David Schwimmer Fan Blog.

Looking at the title of my last post, I realize that doesn't help it either.

So I added the Ninja Kitty.

The internet loves ninjas and its obvious the official mascot of the internet is the cute kitty, I felt I'd rank in the search engine searches for "Ninja Kitty".

So I'm scrolling along the Google Images of "ninja kitty" and I see some cute kitties dressed like ninjas.   I honestly think that the cats aren't really jumping, but they're being thrown and the cat tossers just start snapping pictures of the flying cat and hope for the best.

I also see some TV-14 style art and drawings of women dressed like a ninja kitty.

Oookay??

Then there's the clandestine Hello Kitty dressed like a ninja.  You know... Just because.

And then there's the woman with the Hello Kitty Ninja Warrior upper back/shoulder area tattoo.

Try not to judge! Try not to judge!

SIXTY YEARS IN THE FUTURE

Little Davey: Grandma, what is that red faded blob on your upper back/shoulder area?
Grandma: That's Ninja Kitty!  
Little Davey: Seems like a decision made with not a lot of thought in it.
Grandma: It was.
Little Davey: Do you have any regrets about it?
Grandma: For a while yes.  But then it was featured on a David Schwimmer Fan Blog.  Shortly after it was on the blog, David Schwimmer started trending and got famous again. He wanted to meet and we did.  That's when we fell in love. We had your father and rest is history.

 BACK TO THE PRESENT

So... Ninja Kitty on top will make this blog trending.  I'm going to push publish, then screen shot it and do a post publish edit or something to show you how it looks now with the ninja kitty on top.  That was my whole point of today, to get away from David Schwimmer and I think I just made it worse.

I need to find a focus of this blog.

And apparently Ritalin.

POST PUBLISH EDIT OR SOMETHING


That should throw off the NSA.

ANOTHER POST PUBLISH EDIT OR SOMETHING

I just so happen to refresh the Google Image Search of "Ninja Kitty" and now it shows this.


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DAD HACKS #16


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62 Places Where #KidsEatFree


We at Dad Hacks are all about finding ways to make parenting easier and or cost efficient.  When you have a lot of kids and going out to dinner can get pricey, you tend to stop going out at much.

Just like companies have major promotions were they give out free products just for showing up  (Chic Fil A and 7 Eleven), a lot of restaurants have weekly offers where kids can eat free (or almost free in some cases).

Some Examples Include:

  • Cici's Pizza: Kids under 3 eat free every day.
  • Culver's: Kids 12 and under get a free frozen custard with the purchase of a meal (valid daily).
  • Denny's: Kids eat free at Denny's on Tuesdays from 4-10 p.m. (at some locations, Saturdays, too). Up to two kids get a free meal for every paying adult.
  • Pizza Hut: Kids eat free all day on Tuesdays.
  • TGIFriday's: Kids eat free on Mondays and Tuesdays.

Sean Graw over at BradsDeals.com provided a list of 62 Places Where Kids Eat Free (Or Almost Free).  Be sure to check them out for the full list.  Most of them will probably end up being an Official Dad Hack post sometime in the future.


About Brad’s Deals
Brad's Deals provides an unbiased view of the entire online shopping world and reports on where the best deals are. Brad's Deals is a service, not a store, so we aren't trying to sell you something. We're trying to level the playing field. We're also trying to reduce noise. You'll hear about a store when they have the best deal on something but not when they don't. The idea is to save time, save money and be a better consumer.


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DAD HACKS #14



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DAD HACKS #91



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The David Schwimmer Blog

Howdy. My name is Eric and I used to be a blogger.

Really I was.

Sure my name wasn't mentioned at blogger conferences or on twitter...

or by my family and friends.

But I blogged.  So I was a blogger.

Even when you're a non-famous blogger like I was, D-List actually, you're still considered a blogger.  It's not like you suck at singing and you attempt to sing and your parents say you're really great and when in reality you really stink.

I mean really really stink.

Like myself.

You're not a singer.

I'm not a singer.

No matter what Sister Mary Clarence said in Sister Act 2.

Anyways, blogging is not like singing.  You don't have to be popular or even good to be considered a blogger.  Just go to Blogger (or Wordpress) come up with a title that describes what you want to blog about and hope that it hasn't already been taken.

I'll talk about this later.

So I was a Daddy Blogger.  I wrote Juggling Eric for a few years and then revamped it to Welcome to Boltonshire. Juggling Eric was mainly about my growth. Not like a mole or tumor type of growth, but my growth as an individual and how I dealt with juggling all the roles I had.

The role as a husband and new father. The role of being a Christian, brother, son and friend.  It ended up being mostly about my adventures as a dad. I met a bunch of cool Dad Bloggers and I got to watch them get all famous and stuff while I secretly envied them.

Its like those ensemble TV show sitcoms that was really popular for a long period of time and after ten years the cast breaks up and some go on to be Jennifer Aniston and some become David Schwimmer.

I'm the David Schwimmer of dad bloggers.

I should call this blog "The David Schwimmer Blog".  That'll probably help me in regards to Google searches.



See!!!

Look at that, I didn't even type in his whole name and it's the top of the concern for the current status of "David S"s.

How do you pluralize "David S"??  Was it like I did just a few seconds ago?  I had no idea pluralize was an actual word.  I didn't get the red squiggly line meaning I misspelled it like I do anytime I type "convenient".  You don't know it, but I misspelled "convenient" and fixed it.  I always seem to add an extra "i" in there somewhere.  Sometimes even spell check has no idea what I'm spelling.  So I just change the entire sentence around my poor spelling skills.

I'm self diagnosed with ADHD.

You've known it the whole time reading, but I just changed the name of this post from In Production to The David Schwimmer Blog so now you shouldn't be confused about the title of this blog.  If I get a call from someone with a New York or LA area code telling me to change it, that.. would.. be awesome.

"Mr. Schwimmer is very active.  He's doing voice over work for Madagascar 4: Madagascarians in Space!!!" 

Madagascarians has the red squiggly line underneath it.

I honestly didn't plan on spending this much blog space talking about David Schwimmer. I have nothing against him personally.  While the picture of his profile on IMDB isn't the most flattering, I do approve of his beard.

So hopefully moving away from David Schwimmer.

I can't...

I've actually spent TOO much time on David Schwimmer.  I'll just have to continue in another post.  I've built your expectations up too high and brought the wrong Googlers here with all my talk about David Schwimmer.  I might as well just turn this blog into a David Schwimmer Fan Blog.  I'm sure there's already a David Schwimmer Fan Blog, I'll have to change the name to like.. The Fan Blog of David Schwimmer or The People's Blog of Schwimmerainia.

Okay now I'm just milking it.

I'll cut it there.

I used to be a blogger.

My apologies to Mr. Schwimmer.

Schwimmer has a red squiggly line under it FYI.



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DAD HACKS #7


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DAD HACKS #11


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DAD HACKS #4


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